A Loss

Honey,

Every time I see you I lose my strength, I lose the ability of speaking,

and I sit down staring without any comment!

Staring at your bright eyes, like a couple of shiny stars in a dark place….

I’m losing all of my powers, what I’ve gotta do in this case…?

In the morning, I see the reflection of soft lights upon your pure face…

And when you walk away in the evening, I run to cry behind mountains,

and every moment passes without you equals millions of days…

NOW, the autumn lives inside me and I am the only tree…

Watching sadly leaves falling … But no one can see

I’m losing my mind … My heart is on a flame

I dream about you…. Although I forgot my name

I can’t live without you … I’m going insane

Praying all nights long … hoping for you to show up again

I’ve lost everything, honey

But I still……………….. Can’t lose the pain!

– Ahmad Zain-

Chapter 1: Feels like Home :)

Chapter 1: Feels like Home 🙂

Ever since i’ve unexpectedly moved to Amman, i didnt know what to expect. For me Amman was just a place where i go on hoilday every 2-3 years… meeting family… enjoying weddings… and being a tourist!. When the unexpected news from my parents popped up… i was shocked! i mean im going to be leaving everything behind.. thats besides my clothes and books…BUT My friends! My school! My road! and My life! i didnt know what it would ever feel like to live here but to be honest i was up for the challenge and i was exicted!

But there was a problem! a BIG problem…. what am i going to tell my firends?! they think im coming back…. i mean we had so much planned… to take the same classes together…to apply for university…to visit new places in our hoildays and much more! i was afraid i didnt know how to begin to tell them!.. mainly my best firend.. i mean she hasn’t got anyone but me..i mean we understand eachothers emotions and feelings plus we have known eachother since the 5th grade… we went through happy and bad times together..we are considered to be sisters!. i didnt have the guts! not at all! …

I picked up the phone to call her.. and i said…. ” i wont be coming back.. im staying here with my family….” the reaction was unbelievable!… it had a great effect not only on my best firend but her family too… they have been used to all the times we spent together…. ramadhan, Eid, birthdays,hoildays and sleepovers…for the past 9 years… i felt like i was one of them. Her brothers were mine.. her sisters were mine and my mother was mine.

The unexpected news shocked everyone back in oxford! Everyone!… It was my little hometown… the little roads i walked in are all pictured in my head…the creepy shortcuts home and the amazing places. i never thought i will ever value these places untill they were gone. There was a sense inside me telling me that i am going back… and Amman isnt my home..even though my family is here, my culture and my history… but ive never lived here…i dont know what people do for fun…how you supposed to act what you supposed to say and what you definitely cannot say! i left everything behind, and for the first time ever i felt homesick to a country that’s not mine. I tried hard to forget the fact that i was staying here in Amman… i kept lying to myself that this is just going to be a hoilday… a very long one.

 

A.K.M

Its okay to cry as hard and as long as u want… Just make sure that when you stop crying.. You wont cry for the same reason anymore… 🙂 

Theory 2

We are all weak. No matter how powerful, rich, popular, self-absorbed, or popular we may be. You may look strong on the outside, whether it’s muscles  or simply the way we behave. I will admit that I myself have acted stronger than I really was at one point, and sometimes it’s intended to keep your close ones feeling strong under circumstances. People perceive you as a strong person, only to find that we are simply human. Inside we are growing weak, but our actions show otherwise. This may be a healthy approach, but you must feel strong on the inside so that you feel invincible  Otherwise, our hope will diminish and weakness will overcome the soul.

Humans are born weak, and until we figure out a better  way for our minds to work, we will stay weak. In other words, it is up to us to stay strong mentally, because true strength shows when: a person doesn’t give up on life once things turn bad, they don’t give up when something is too hard, and they don’t settle for something because it is what they want but for a choice that is better for them or the people around them.

People must drink water. They must eat and exercise. We, humans, need to protect our bodies and the surroundings they inhabit. These are some of the basic necessities to living healthy lives. However, other than physical health, there is mental health. Mental health affects us the same way as, and sometimes more than, physical health. Therefore, we must focus on our mental strength and letting things go. Life is short. Don’t waste time on things that don’t matter and stress only YOU. Choose things that better you or benefit your future, not things that you want in that moment. Otherwise, you will regret these naive decisions. Think of you, your future, and your health.

My theory: Stress should be sinful. Be happy, relax, live in serenity. If it means getting away, do it. This will keep you mentally strong, and feeling clear minded enough to make sharp and thoughtful decisions in your life.

-A

Debating Hope

Today’s passionate debate flowed from the following quote …

“I’m not talking about blind optimism, the kind of hope that just ignores the enormity of the tasks ahead or the road blocks that stand in our path. I’m not talking about the wishful idealism that allows us to just sit on the sidelines or shirk from a fight.

I have always believed that hope is that stubborn thing inside us that insists, despite all the evidence to the contrary, that something better awaits us so long as we have the courage to keep reaching, to keep working, to keep fighting.”

– President Obama, 2012 Victory Speech

We discussed the hope, happiness, and positivity … as well as the lack of hope, unhappiness, and negativity … in our lives. A passionate debate ensued about finding happiness in a hard life — and whether or not Arabs, in general, and Jordanians, in particular, have a negative outlook on life.

 

 

The conversation could have had us talking for hours…

Does your environment define your happiness? Do your circumstances, and factors outside of your control, shape your attitude?

or does your attitude color your environment? Can you make up your mind to be happy, and maintain positivity no matter where you find yourself?

…. what effect can we have on our own lives? our own futures?

Needless to say, we didn’t come up with any answers.

But that wasn’t really the point, was it?

“It is better to debate a question without settling it than to settle a question without debating it.”
– Joesph Joubert

“Time spent arguing is, oddly enough, almost never wasted.” – Christopher Hitchens

Spoken Word – “I died last year in a car accident”

Theory 1

We’re all born as individuals, each with our own personality, beliefs, etc. We all have different paths to follow, one which will lead us to our future, our destiny. Through the process of accomplishing this, we must go through a series of steps. These steps are unanticipated, and when we confront them, there are choices to make. At times, the simplest decisions can seem the most difficult. And when we finally take a step, we find ourselves on the wrong path.

We will make wrong choices, and as a result lessons will be learned. There will times when we will feel hurt, betrayed, and weak. Accordingly, in extreme cases they may drive us to actions and behaviors that we will regret later.

Everybody goes through these experiences. Trial and error is human, and perfection is something no one will ever accomplish. So what must we do to avoid such situations? There is no correct answer, because there is no right choice, nor a right path to choose. These instances will give us a chance to know who we really are. What things are important to us, and what we want for ourselves.

Here’s my theory: Stay true to yourself and don’t let the choices of others affect your path. In the end, it’s only you. Choose what is GOOD for you, and imagine these in your future. Be self-dependent and stay strong always.

This is life, and every day it takes a step forward. It works to change for the better, as should you.

-A

Taking Action: Quote Analysis

 

“Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. Its not.”

–      Dr. Seuss

 

 

“As life is action and passion, it is required of a man that he should share the passion and action of his time, at peril of being judged not to have lived.”

–      Oliver Wendell Holmes

 

 

The future does not belong to those who are content with today, apathetic toward common problems and their fellow man alike, timid and fearful in the face of new ideas and bold projects….

It will belong to those who see that wisdom can only emerge from the clash of contending views, the passionate expression of deep and hostile beliefs.

Plato said:

“A life without criticism is not worth living.”

–      RFK

Job Interviews

http://www.zimbio.com/watch/6QMMABkYBgQ/Dupree+Scene+Dupree+Job+Interview/You,+Me+and+Dupree

 

 

“hardworking, alpha male, jackhammer, merciless, insatiable…”

 

to 1:33

Conversation Topic: Same Sex Marriage

 

 

 

 

“As we talked about the “election issues” in the US today, we talked about the issue of Same Sex Marriage.

Same sex marriage (marriage between a man/man or woman/woman) is a controversial issue in the United States and a “non-issue” in Jordan. Some parts of the United States are very tolerant of same-sex or gay marriage; some parts are not. For example, man/man or woman/woman can be married in Massachusetts, USA but not in North Carolina, USA.

In the USA, President Obama supports same-sex marriage, and he said so on TV. One young American girl who heard Obama say this then wrote him a letter. She has two dads — her parents are a same-sex married couple — thanked Obama for being nice to them.

 

 

 

In response, President Obama wrote her a letter — in his letter he explained why many Americans support same-sex marriage —->

“Our differences unite us. You and I are blessed to live in a country where we are born equal no matter what we look like on the outside, where we grow up, or who our parents are. A good rule is to treat others the way you hope they will treat you.

 

 

 

http://equallywed.com/headlines/1737-president-obama-and-10-year-old-girl-with-two-dads-exchange-letters.html